Lately, I’ve been feeling some sort of mid-summer malaise. Part of it is that we have had a lot going on, with travel, a weeknight ceramics class, continuing the running regime, etc… that have all thrown my sleep schedule off. I am not tired when I supposed to be tired, and horribly tired when I try and get up in the morning. Work has been stressful, but not super busy, so there is plenty of time to think about how I may or may not be living up to the expectations that my new boss and co-workers have for me.
My step-sister and her husband came for a visit last week. To tell the truth, I was a bit nervous about their visit as I haven’t really spent very much time around my step-sister, especially in recent years, and most of our interactions have been amidst the chaos of large family gatherings. Despite the fact that I talked entirely too fast during much of their visit and Evan barely spoke for the first half of the week (we compliment each other nicely in that way), I think the visit was a good one. She is five years older than me, and so growing up she was a huge role model to me, a guide to the sort of adult I wanted to eventually become. It was nice on this visit to get to relate to each other as adults. Having them visit, however, made me terribly homesick both for the friends in grad school that we had the same sort of dinners with and the family that is no longer so close.
What I thought would be a relaxing Saturday, turned out to be the exact opposite. Evan and I went to the Monet exhibit at the Legion of Honor. It was a mad house (yeah, yeah, despite being a newbie to the city, even I should have known better). On the drive into San Francisco, there was a horrible wreck on the highway, so a fifteen minute drive turned into a hour one (good thing I had my knitting). When we finally found a parking spot, a car with a priest in full garb stole it (there were a couple of weddings on the grounds that afternoon). In the actual exhibit, people were crammed together like sardines. You couldn’t appreciate the paintings because you couldn’t even see them. When we left the special exhibit and toured the rest of the museum, it was nearly empty and there we got to see a few Monet paintings, a VanGogh , a Degas, a Dali, a Picasso, etc… all by ourselves. In the Monet exhibit, they talked about how he stopped visiting Normandy during the tourist season so that he could paint in solitude. I can understand why.
I don’t want people to think that I am some lame-o who doesn’t appreciate all the great things that the area has to offer, because I do appreciate these things. I love the hustle and bustle of the city, the great arts events (we just bought tickets for Revenge of the Bookeaters), the lovely surroundings, the fact that it is never too hot or too cold. It’s just hard to be around so many other people appreciating these things when all you really want is a nice meal with old friends or a cuddle with your niece.
And yeah, I know it takes time to adjust to a new place, even one as lovely as this.